71 years later-love still wins

   "All because two people fell in love"~
John B. Scott, Jr. and Lois Scott-July 31, 1940


I miss hearing Mom tell the story of how she and daddy eloped that day.  Heck, when I first heard it I didn't even know what that word "eloped" meant.  But I soon learned and every July 31st that rolled around after that, we kids would sit wide-eyed and pay attention as the story of their marriage was lovingly retold once again.


Mom and Daddy loved each other very much and by the summer of 1940 they had decided to be married.  But my maternal grandparents, Andrew and Catherine Brown, must not have liked my dad too much.  In the weeks preceding their July 31st marriage, I am sure they must have tried to dissuade my mom from making him her choice for a husband. Not sure how long it took for them to figure out that all of their pleading and begging for her to make another "choice" was not going to do any good.  Lois Scott was stubborn...yes MOM, I said that!  You WERE stubborn. LOL, and that strong will and determination was going to make the decision about who to marry.


You know, the really goofy thing about all of that was that we kids never got a straight answer as to why they felt that way.  To us, our daddy was the most wonderful man alive and we couldn't understand why anyone wouldn't have chosen him to be the "one" for our mom. 


Be all things as they may, in the early morning hours of July 31, 1940, Mom wrote a short note to her parents, dressed in her best outfit, and crawled out the window of her bedroom at the family home on the Sandhills farm.  I can't imagine that she had slept much that night before and I'm guessing that my Dad didn't get alot of sleep either.


She met Daddy at a pre-arranged time and place....6 a.m. at the very end of the lane of her parent's farm.   It brings tears to my eyes to imagine how much they must have loved one another, especially to do such a "daring deed" as to disobey their parents and run off to get married.  


Don't know how long it took for them to make the journey from the farm just between Burrton and Halstead to the Sedgwick County Courthouse in Wichita.  But they made it!  And at noon that day, the Justice of the Peace for the city of Wichita pronounced them "Mr. and Mrs. John B. Scott, Jr.". 


I would be so remiss if I told you the story and left out the BEST PART-the strawberry pop story.  After the ceremony was over, I'm sure the reality hit them as to what they had just done. They might have been married but they were still two very young people.....Daddy only 17 and Mom two years older, age 19.  They'd run off to marry against their parent's wishes and now had to go back home and "face the music".  But they didn't worry-


It was a very hot day, long before the days of AC in ANYTHING!  They were thirsty, so before they made the long journey home again, they used the money left in Daddy's pocket to buy a bottle of cold strawberry soda from a pop machine there.  And so they sat on the courthouse steps that "fateful" day and passed the bottle back and forth between themselves, sharing their own personal "toast" to a future together.  


I can't even imagine what that first meeting back home with my grandparents must have been like....but whatever was said, it didn't matter.  Eventually everyone figured it out that "love wins" in the end and in no time at all,  Daddy became a part of their family.  The seven little babies born because of their love for one another said words of "thanks" as well!

This is mom and dad and 5 of their seven kids on July 31, 1982.  Daddy was dying from cancer and we knew that his "fight" with that awful disease would soon be done.  We wanted to give them, the wedding "reception" that they never had that day.  So we kids and our spouses and children joined them for supper complete with wedding cake, mints, punch and gifts! 


 Normally, Daddy would have put up a fuss about doing something like that.  But I guess knowing that your days are "so numbered" allowed him to see how very important it was to allow us kids to honor their life together.  5 months later, he was gone and life never was the same again for any of us.  They made it 42 years~not too bad for two kids who many thought would NEVER make it together.  


Later this afternoon, their children who still remain will join together with their own families and friends to celebrate the life that they enjoyed so much during that 42 year span of time.  We'll be in a place they called "Home" for so very long....Haven, Kansas.  We surely shall say a prayer of thanksgiving that despite all they must have had going against them, that their love for each other was strong enough to survive.  Why would anyone have ever doubted?  


  

What triggers the memory?

 Yesterday, on the first day of the "Scott Family Reunion of 2011", I spent time with my sister Kaye and nephew Scott and wife, Lisa all here from Sarasota, Florida.  They had arrived in the "wee hours" of the morning and after a 5-hour sleep, we decided to go and see several places that have special meaning to our family.


I have to say, we packed a whole lot of stuff into a very short span of time.  We traveled to Halstead to visit the graves of our parents, brother Mike, sister Janice, and niece Kimberly.  Scott learned about his Quaker heritage as we drove out to the Fairview Quaker Cemetery just north of Halstead.  He took a moment to study the monument erected to our great-great grandmother, Rebecca Burch.  The marker there is to honor her as the last living pensioner of a Revolutionary War Veteran in the United States.  


We saw the farm where all of us lived in the Sandhills of Harvey County as well as the "big house" in town.  Kaye was excited to see the little country school house she attended as well as Burrton High School where she graduated from in 1959.  And I must say that as much as we found how things had changed there were still many things that seemed familiar and much the same.

Something very interesting happened to me today as we were traveling down "memory lane."  I tried to take photos of all the different places that we went, and three of those photos in particular stirred up old memories that I had not thought of for such a very long time.  If it's ok with you, I'd like to tell you about them.  So here goes.....


The photo above was taken while we were visiting our old home in the Sandhills of Harvey County. The minute we drove up, my attention immediately went to the little tiny cinder block house that still stood after all the years of its existence. 


 When the Scott family lived there, we always referred to this as the "milk house" because after our herd of Holstein cattle was milked, it was always stored in a cooler there until the milk man from the Tip Top Dairy in  Moundridge came to haul it off to town. 


 The little cinder block building had also been a "playhouse" for my younger sister, Cindy and I.  It seemed especially nice on hot summer days in July to be able to walk inside and immediately feel its coolness.  I can still hear the sound of the windmill that stood adjacent to it.


Perhaps the "weirdest" thing I can remember about the milk house was that it became a refuge, a very "safe haven" for Cindy and I when our dad and uncles performed the annual rite of butchering  a couple of hogs for the family's use.  We little kids hated butchering time and I can still see the sight of a big fat hog hanging upside down in the tree that was right next to the garage!


  I have vivid memories of quickly hiding in that little house with my fingers pushed tightly into my ears so I wouldn't hear the sound of the pig squealing. Yeah, yeah, yeah I know....I wasn't a very tough little farm girl!  LOL-After that part was over, it was actually kind of fun to watch them dress out the pig.  


Hey, I ALMOST forgot the "extra special" bonus from hog butchering time.....with all the extra lard that was now available for use in mom's kitchen, our family enjoyed the treat of home made donuts for several weeks afterwards.  Now THAT was good eating!  :) Lovers of "Daylight Donuts" or "Krispy Kremes"-eat your hearts out.  Lois Scott's donuts were a thousand times better!

On the way back home to Hutchinson, we stopped for a moment in the small town of Burrton, KS to see the elementary and high schools there.  All of the Scott kids began their educational experience there with my three oldest siblings, Kaye, Janice and Mike graduating from there.  The rest of us, Sherry, Dick, Cindy and I went on to graduate from Haven after our folks moved there in 1964.  


The grade school and high school at Burrton have changed quite a bit since we last attended there, now over 40 years ago.  As we stopped and took a few final photos, I found a spot that triggered a memory I hadn't thought of since 1963.  Take a look at the photos below, please.

I believe that as long as I live, I will never forget what happened to me as I walked through the front door (first picture above) and sat down in the classroom shown in the picture directly above.  


That Friday in 1963 was actually a pretty decent kind of day, with Indian summer type of weather.  It was recess-time and all of the kids attending school at Burrton were out on the playground, enjoying what all of us had come to know as a "dang good life."  


We were yelling and having a great time.  I'm sure that I must have been playing on the swings with my good friends, Shirley and Kathy.  Who knows, maybe we were hoping that the cute little boys in our class would come over and chase us around the playground.  Hey, we were 9 years old--you could do things like that and get by with it!  :)


Shortly before 1:00,  we noticed our teacher, Mrs. Randall, standing outside the school and she whistled us to get to the door.  I recall that whistle's sound vividly, even today so many decades later.  By the time all 30+ kids made it to the door, we could tell that she had been crying and with a soft and whispered voice she told us that we all had to go into the building very quickly and quietly, and get straight to our desks.  Man, what had happened?


When we got inside our room, we were told to put our heads down on our desks and wait for an announcement.  In no time at all, the voice of our principal, Mr. Voth, came over the loud speaker to inform us that President John F. Kennedy had just been assassinated and that we were all being sent home immediately!  


I can remember kids asking Mrs. Randall, "what does that mean, assassinated?" and with tears rolling down her cheek she said that he was dead.  Our class was stunned as was every other person in that school house, in the town, and in the nation. 


The events of that Friday, November 22, 1963 left an everlasting mark on me and the sight of that entryway door and that 3rd grade classroom from the land of "long ago and far, far away" triggered the saddest of feelings for just a moment yesterday.  


That somber Friday from almost 48 years ago now surely marked the end of the innocence for my generation of Americans.  Thinking back to everything that has happened in the years that have followed since, it's probably a good thing that we do NOT know what lies in our futures.  Many of us wouldn't have the courage or the faith needed to go on this life, if we DID know.


No matter if they would be bad or good ones, I am most grateful for the blessing of memories.  Recollections just like the ones I experienced yesterday help me to remember my upbringing in a world in which not everything that happened was good and I guess that's why they refer to this passage of time as LIFE.


Have a great day Facebook friends and family!  I'm heading out the door to make even MORE memories!  :)  I hope you do the same...................... 

Collin Raye - If You Get There Before I Do

For our mom and dad -"All because two people fell in love" and got married on July 31, 1940. Without your love for one another, 7 little babies would not have been born. We are gathering together in your honor and your dear memory to celebrate that special love this weekend.  Thanks to both of you for making us a FAMILY.  Celebrating together in Heaven where the strawberry pop is ice cold and you don't have to share a bottle between you!  We shall lift our bottles in a toast to you both.  Until our family is all together once again, we say how much we love you and miss you still!

Remembering from where I came....

50 years ago, that "sainted" lady in the photo above was both teacher and momma to a group of 29 kindergarten kids that went to school every day at Burrton Grade School.  Mrs. Jo Marmont loved her students and claimed them as her OWN kids to anyone who asked her.  She adored us and we loved her as well.  


As I work through the Miller Bucket List, especially Item #9, "to connect with family members all over the U.S." I am soberly reminded of the fact that many people who were not my "blood relation" had a huge hand in my upbringing.  Mrs. Jo Marmont was one of those people. 


I remember her as this beautiful woman who wore shiny red fingernail polish and ruby red lipstick to school each day.  I'm pretty positive that she wore high heels with silk stockings and the most beautiful dresses that you could imagine.  I remember her taking a liking to me and it seemed like wherever she was in the classroom, little Peggy Scott would not be far  behind.  


By the way, have you located me yet in the photo?  If not, just keep in mind that I was even shorter then than I am now so if I were you, I'd try the front row.  Just keep moving over to the right until you locate that little kid with curly hair....see her, the one with the teacher's hand lovingly holding her dress collar?  Yes, that's the one...that would be me!


May I ask you to consider something this day?  Who had a hand in helping bring you up in this world?  Was there a kind teacher, just like Jo Marmont in your life?  Or, perhaps the neighbors living next door, you know, the ones with 12 kids of their own yet they always seemed to have the room to fit one or two more at the supper table?  Or grandmas and grandpas, the aunts and uncles, your school bus driver, the Sunday School teacher, the mean old lady on the corner who really loved you but you just thought she was grouchy?  And the list goes on and on and on.  Wow, you were really blessed weren't you?  And so was I.     


When all of our family "re-connects" this weekend in Haven, you can be sure that we will be sharing hours and hours of conversation about all of those folks from our past that have helped in the "raising up" of the children of John and Lois Scott.  The stories that we tell can get a little "embellished" from time to time, but that's what makes them fun to listen to.  If "laughter is the best medicine" then none of us should be visiting the doctor's office any time too soon.  Since we 5 remaining Scott kids range in age from 53-70 now, that is just an added bonus!


Jo Marmont is long gone now.  I wish I could have told her a few things then but I had to wait until now to understand them.  So Mrs. Marmont, this final message is for you....


To my very dear Mrs. Marmont,


Oh, how I wish to thank you for the wonderful kindergarten experience you gave to me and the 28 other kids that were in our classroom.  You took such exceptionally good care of us and taught us so many life lessons that year.  And the amazing thing is, you did it all single-handedly....no classroom aide to help you, no computer gadgets to make your job so much easier.  And as far as we kids knew, you never once complained.


It might surprise you to know that I, too, became a teacher Mrs. Marmont.  The classroom has changed a thousand times over in the last half-century and some of the differences, well, I don't think you'd approve of.  But what will NEVER CHANGE is the love of a teacher for her students.  Thank you for instilling that love in me in order that I was able to "pay it forward" to another generation of learners.


I will remember  you always and in that remembrance, may I be half of the teacher that you were Jo Marmont.  Save me a seat in the kindergarten area up there!  I'll look forward to seeing you again one day.


Love,


Peggy Scott

Remembering my father's land-Miller Bucket List Item #7

There's a little tiny spot in the world, about 820 miles due north of my home in south central Kansas that became the seasonal home of my father for  nearly 25 years in a row.  Drake, North Dakota (population, not so many) was always the final stop in my father's yearly trek through the Great Plains as a custom wheat cutter.  


Daddy loved that place and I'm positive that had it not been for the grueling North Dakota winters, he would have moved his family, "lock, stock and barrel" there.  Daddy particularly loved the people of North Dakota and they always seemed to love and respect him as well.  


Next week, after our family reunion is over and folks are safely on their way home, I am going to honor  my father's memory and make another journey back to see the part of the country that he so dearly loved.  It will be a fast trip but I intend to pack as many memories into the journey as I can.


I sit here, writing these words, knowing full well that my father died at an age that I will myself see in only 3 more very short years.  I didn't realize how YOUNG he was until I myself reached this 50 something milestone.  His last 18 months were spent battling lung cancer to no avail and the fight was lost in 1982 when he was only 59 years old.  


I'm anxious to head there and meet up with old friends that still call that part of the country their home.  Although I'll be traveling on my own, I'm pretty sure that John Scott, Jr. will go along for the ride!  No need to worry about me-I'll be in the best of hands....His hands and my daddy's.

The harvest crew at Haven, KS  June of 1976

 Daddy, in the field at Balfour, ND  August 1977

You had to be there to understand-Part Two

After giving it some thought and heeding the advice of a very close friend to "elaborate" a bit...I guess I do owe you all a bit of an explanation for the previous post in "honor" of the driver that I angered a few days back.


When I say that I was minding my own business, really that is what I was doing, MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS.  I didn't wake up that Friday morning and say, "Man, who should I 'tick' off today?"  It simply happened.


It was about 12:30 in the afternoon and I was headed to South Hutch.  I had gone up Avenue A from my home on 14th Street and had almost made it to Main Street when I met "Mr. Not Such a Nice Guy".  We were at the stop light there, him in front in his SUV and me behind in my little blue Chevy Colorado.  And THEN it happened.


Another truck, pulling a long trailer behind it, had made a turn into the eastbound lane that we were in. The only problem was that he pulled out too wide and would have never made the complete turn without running into Mr. Not Such a Nice Guy.  


It was obvious that the other driver needed room, lots of it and rather quickly.  So the driver in front of me, totally oblivious to the fact that I was right behind him, decided to give the other driver some room.  May I add here, he was oblivious to the fact that I was behind him because he was yapping nonstop on his cellphone.  (sorry, just had to add that)   He put his SUV in reverse and gunned it to move back and give him enough space to complete his turn.


Well guys, here I am sitting in my little blue truck.  All I see is the rear end of his SUV barreling back towards me at about 100 mph.  The only thing I can think of to do is lay on the horn, loud and long in hopes that he will not hit me.  Turns out THAT was the wrong thing to do.


As soon as he heard that horn, he put his car back into drive and immediately stuck his finger up in what Jethro Bodine of the Beverly Hillbillies would refer to as the "California Hello". 


 Now you know,  it's interesting when you look up the definition of the "California Hello" in the urban dictionary.   There it is referred to as putting your "peace sign" up and your index down.  Well, Mr. Not Such a Nice Guy was actually pretty good at it.  In fact, he was SO good that he decided to do it over and over while waiting for the light to change to green.


45 minutes later, the light turned green and he finally was able to turn south onto Main.  Friends, I am not idiot-even though I needed to go south as well, I took the long way around to avoid running into him on Main Street.  My heart was pounding, legs shaking and all the while, I am wondering what the heck that guy was thinking of?


I don't how many of you are familiar with the acronym  "HALT".  A good friend, many years ago, taught me what those very familiar letters stand for.....  Never let yourself get too Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired.  If I try to make sense of that other driver's poor behavior and judgement, I have to wonder if perhaps he might have not heard of that advice.  I can only suppose so.


Have any of you ever been the victim of road rage?  The experience makes you pause and think about those that you pass each day on the road as they travel to and from one place to another.  Luckily for me, the experience was short lived, although those 45 seconds at the red light seemed like every bit of 45 minutes.  No one was physically hurt, no property damage done....although I did have visions of his putting the SUV into park and coming back to break the windshield out of the Colorado.  Thankfully, that never had to happen.


I suppose the lesson I learned THAT day was that you can never predict what someone else is going to do.  And the truth is, I don't think I could have done anything any different.  If he was that "ticked off" by my honking at him, just imagine what he would have been like had he  backed right into me.  Someone would not have had a very nice day!
  

The Clampett's-Jed, Jethro Bodine, Elly May, and Grannie  with Duke "the wonder dog".

Peggy's "alter ego"-Rex the dinosaur from Toy Story.  We both HATE confrontations!  :)

You had to be there to understand

In honor of the guy driving ahead of me on Avenue A two days ago who didn't appreciate my warning him that he was just about to back straight into me at about 20 mph....LOL-  And REALLY, I am a nice person....

Thanks for allowing me to laugh friends...it wasn't very funny when it happened.  Keeping life in its proper perspective this night!

MILLER BUCKET LIST-PART 2

As I sit here and write this post, I do so with the realization that having a "bucket list" has innumerable benefits that I never even thought of until now.  One of the greatest benefits, I believe, is a bucket list's ability to help fight depression.  So, if you don't mind, I'd like to talk about that subject....depression.


I don't know about the rest of you, but life has this way of getting pretty depressing at times for me.  It comes from a combination of things that one would normally attribute feeling "blue or low" to.  You know, things like, a death in the family, loss of a job, working at a job you hate, being divorced and then alone, economic issues...and the list goes on and on.  Sometimes I've even felt depressed for no apparent reason...kind of like when everything "seems" like it's fine on the outside but something isn't quite right on the inside.  And for the life of me, I cannot "put a finger" on what makes me feel depressed.


I've fought depression off and on now for the past 10 years.  No, I am going to be honest...I've fought it for the past 26 years.  I've taken medicine and seen countless therapists over the years but nothing has really done the trick completely.  My greatest outlet for the relief of depression has been to write and write and write.  I have filled countless notebooks with my thoughts, hopes, and fears.  In the midst of all the journal making, I discovered that I actually liked to write....a nice surprise for me.


Friends, thanks for letting me drop off an additional "heavy load" that I've been carrying over the years.  I haven't told all that many people that depression and I are on a "first name basis" and I'm not sure why.  Some people who suffer depression express the feeling that they don't want others to think of them as "weak" and you know, I pretty much understand how they feel.  But for me, I know that it would have been "weak" to continue to suffer from it and not get any help to get through it.


 I'm going to guess that my overall mental, emotional, and physical health have improved a "thousand fold" this summer as I have worked through so many of the items on the Miller Bucket List.  Having a list has given me the chance to focus more on the positive things this life has to offer.  The negative things are still there, but now I seem to be able to look at them in their proper perspective.  And by the way, my prescription for Welbutrin remains "unfilled" since early April....and I like that!


Having already finished several things on my original list...it's definitely time to add a few more and begin to work on them.  I will ALWAYS follow the admonition of my very good friend who told me to remember, "you can't kick a full bucket."  So here's the new list that still contains 3 or 4 items from the original list:


1.  To canoe down the Ark River once again on an Indian Summer day.
2.  To ride on the back of a motorcycle, kind of fast, and live to tell about it.
3.  To visit Maine and see a lighthouse.
4.  To learn how to drive a standard transmission vehicle.
5.  To learn how to sew something very simple.
6.  To connect with all of my Facebook friends in person and buy them something to drink.
7.  To visit the land of my father's "adopted state" of North Dakota and follow his custom combining route to get there.
8.  To learn to be more "forgiving" of myself.
9.  To continue to "reconnect" with family members living all over the United States.
10.To NEVER allow my "bucket" to become empty.


Hey, guess what?  It sure feels good to not be carrying around that stupid backpack that contained all my fears about letting you know what I sometimes go through in being depressed. Whew!  My step just got a WHOLE lot lighter!  :)

Oh my gosh, I really did pass! :)

Well friends, it FINALLY happened!  45 long years after a 10-year old's perceived "near drowning" at swimming lessons, I PASSED THE FIRST SESSION OF SWIMMING LESSONS...and so I guess I'm now officially a "polliwog".  And I could not be prouder!  :)
This photo shows my teacher, Laurie, and I after finishing up our 4th lesson today at the YMCA.  


I have always believed that we would never be able to get through this thing called "life" without the encouragement and support of our family and friends.  So on this monumental day in the life of a "former 10-year old" water phobic, I must indeed offer my thanks to some people who helped me along this journey.


If it would not have been for one the dearest and most special people to me in this life. I would have never considered learning to swim in the first place.  But when my dear friend learned of my bucket list and that I didn't know how to swim at all, he so wisely steered me away from getting a tattoo and replacing that desire with "learning to swim well enough to save my own life someday."  So to that person I say a sincere thank-you and that your friendship means everything to me.


And then, how can I forget my "anonymous" friend who had the YMCA staff  send me the application for private adult swim lessons.  I still don't know who you were and I may never know.  But may I say "thank you" that you care enough about me to give me that little "kick in the seat of the pants" to get me going.  Without your "quiet encouragement" I might not have started lessons so quickly.   Now, I am excited enough to continue them further.  


Oh, and dear Cleta!  The nice woman who sent me the letter from the Y.  Cleta, you are one of the very best secret keepers I've ever come across.  There's no way I would have been able to get any names out of you as to who wanted me to have that letter.  And the REALLY nice thing is, now I have a new friend named Cleta Ellington whom I may never have met without the kindness of another person.   Isn't it amazing how one good thing always seems to lead to another and another.  


And for all the little kids who gave me such wise advice on swimming.  Dear Meggy, my niece in Florida, had it pretty much figured out and I tried to listen to what she told me to do.  You know what?  It really works!  When I asked some of my summer school students for "tips" on back floating better, they all had pretty much the same advice...just relax Mrs. Miller and keep your tummy up!  I think they've heard that from someone else before!  


Couldn't forget about the two Lauries-well, actually Lori and Laurie.  Lori Johnson, my dear friend from Lincoln School, went with me to the Y one day just to help me get used to the water.  She didn't mind a bit, even though she swims in the lap-pool, hanging out in the 3 foot water with me during the early practices.  My deepest thanks to a very wonderful swim teacher who is also the Aquatic Director at the YMCA, Laurie.  Wow, who could have asked for a better teacher than her? Her calm demeanor, kindness, encouragement and very gentle prodding along the way helped me to stay in the water longer than I've ever done in my whole life.  I do believe, at this point in time, that I will always refer to her as "Laurie, the Miracle worker."  


and to mom, well....


Dear Mom, I did it!  I made it through all four lessons without crying.  I listened to what the teacher said to do and you know what, I didn't drown!  I can face float and back float now Mom and just for good measure, I can even kick while I'm doing it.  Today, I actually felt like you were there with me...sitting along the side of the pool and I did my best Mom because I wanted you to be proud of me!  And I know you are. I didn't cry at the lessons but the little 10-year old girl that I used to be (and still am in many ways) is crying right now.  I miss you and daddy and every day mom I still try to be a "good girl" just like you said I was.  I would say to have a great day in Heaven Mom, but every day is great there!  :) See you when I get there..... Love, Peggy

Brad Paisley - When I Get Where I'm Going

For Mom and Dad, Mike, Janice and Kimmie, and all the other family members  "gone on before us".  There will be "empty" spots at the reunion table next weekend.  But we will look forward to a much grander reunion with you someday when we all get together once more in our Heavenly home.  So until then--  Daily thinking of you, never forgetting you, ALWAYS loving you our family.  

Mom's wish

One of the greatest and most memorable of gifts that my mom gave to me was given in the late evening hours of September 24, 2007.  And as long as I live, I swear that I will NEVER forget what that gift was.


Mom lived her last 4 years of life in a long-term care nursing  facility here in Hutchinson.  And oh, how she hated it!  But Mom knew there was no other option for her and so she just endured it.  All during the month of September that year of 2007, her health steadily declined.  By the time she had reached her 89th birthday on September 12th, we realized that she probably wouldn't be with us a whole lot longer.


The doctors had exhausted every available treatment and medicine for her ailments to absolutely no avail.  As her kidneys began to fail, we realized that we needed the help of our local hospice.  Any of you who have ever been assisted by hospice workers know how these folks are surely "angels sent from God above."  


By the morning of September 24th, Mom had decided that "enough was enough" and she just simply quit trying to get better.  I think she just plain "surrendered".  By mid-day, under the advice of our hospice nurse, we began to make frantically quick phone calls to family members close enough to get home in time to be with her before she passed away. 


As late evening approached, nearly all of us who could get there had assembled in mom's room.  I was sitting on her bed with her just watching her as she drifted in and out of the "morphine induced" sleep that she was in.  About 9, she woke up and looked at me and that's when she gave me "the gift."  As clear as a bell, eyes wide open, Mom gazed into my eyes and said, "Peggy Ann, you are a good girl."  


I wanted to burst into tears but somehow got it together and I said to her "Thank you Mom."  And that was it.  She said no more coherent words to me and just a few hours after that, she was gone.  I remember crawling up beside her in that bed and laying my head down on her chest and bawling just like I was a little baby.  I had thousands of questions for her about life that I hadn't had time to ask yet and I didn't want to become an orphan without knowing the answers to at least some of them...But it was too late.


When I look at the "Miller Bucket List" and study the remaining ones that are not  yet completed, my eyes always go back to #8-"To reconnect with my family members all over the United States once again."  I believe that my mom would tell me that #8 is the most important of all .


By late next week, the remaining children of John and Lois Scott will gather once more here in Hutchinson for what has now turned out to be the "3rd Annual Scott Family Reunion."  It will be the first time since 1993 to be able to see our sister, Kaye Wright from Sarasota, Florida.  We are thankful for her son and daughter-in-law, Scott and Lisa Wright for driving their mom here.  Because they are willing make the 2-day journey from Florida to Kansas, we all shall be reunited here at home.  I owe a debt of thanks to Scott and Lisa-


It's my hope that mom would be glad that we all have tried to stick together in the years since she left us.  I heard her say, more than once, that when she and daddy were gone that all we kids would have to hang onto were one another.  And yet one more time I must say, "Mom, looks like you were right again!"

John and Lois Scott and their family-June 1, 1956

Child #6, hey that's me, is the baby.  Our baby sister, Cindy, is the little twinkle in our daddy's eyes.

I lack nothing

It's on days like these that I have to keep remembering my blessings instead of constantly whining about the weather.  But when day after day after day in south central Kansas has temps of over 100 degrees and absolutely no rain, it's a little harder.  I have now become the "best friend" of my arch-enemies "The Squirrel Family" and daily try to provide some type of way for them to get cool as well.  

And if I remember to count my blessings, I will surely remember my facebook friends.  Recently, 3 of them helped me out with #6 on the Miller Bucket List....."to buy each of my facebook friends something to drink."  Here they are-I'd love for you to know them.  They are good people!

This wonderful lady is my very good friend, Pat Lillard.  Pat and I go waaay back to the days of life at Burrton Grade School and teachers like Jo Marmont and Irene Thompson.  We didn't know each other personally back then, but in later years we caught up with one another when we were both teachers at Avenue A Elementary. Pat is someone that I look to as a "mentor teacher"-she has helped me out more times than I care to remember!  

This is my favorite picture of Pat and I.  Those two little cute babies are the Harris twins...I've got Ben and Pat has Kate.  We were practicing our "grandmother" skills that day!  Hard to believe that photo was taken almost 2 years ago now.  Hey, I think we look like we know what we are doing!  :)

Meet Haddie Kent and her little sister, Kinley.  Haddie and I have known one another since she was in the pre-k class at Avenue A.  We actually got to spend a fair amount of time together since her grandma is my good friend and co-teacher, Pat Lillard.  It's been kind of nice to have Haddie as my friend on Facebook.  Her posts help keep me "in the loop" on what happens in the lives of soon-to-be 6th graders.  

Recently Haddie went with me to the YMCA to work on swimming skills.  We had a great time just hanging around in the 4 foot water area and talking about life and what it's like to be a kid today.  I'm a firm believer in the fact that most of us "old people" (that would be me) need to stay in better touch with what is happening in the lives of our youth.  They have so many great ideas and thoughts about life and if we just take time to LISTEN to them, we might learn a thing or two ourselves.

I just love this guy!  This "kid" is my nephew, Christopher Scott of Haven.  Ok, so he's really NOT a kid but in his Aunt Peggy's mind and heart, he will always be that little fellow that I knew so very long ago.  Christopher works for the City of Haven and spends his days traveling the streets of Haven running the trash truck.  He has a kind heart and a good soul.  We had fun last night, and for the price of a diet dr. pepper, we shared a lot of life's meaning!  :)  Love you Christopher!

Oh for the good old days...when little kids could go to Grandma Scott's house and be spoiled silly just in time to be given back to their parents.  Here are Christopher and his sister, Jessica and my oldest son, Ricky.  

I now live in the same house where this photo was taken well over 28 years ago now...If I listen carefully, I can still almost hear the voices of those little kids playing in this house.  :)

Life has been so good to me-the heat and drought will end sometime...I don't believe it will go on forever.  I am well-cared for and I lack for nothing this day.  I pray the same for you friends......don't give up hope, ever!

lesson learned

As far as I'm concerned, the "Miller Bucket List" taught me a very valuable lesson today about life and its brevity.  Item #5, "To see the most beautiful sunrise and sunset in the world" is now COMPLETE.  Take a look at sunset, over my hometown of Haven, Kansas this evening.

Someone asked me one time, how would I know that I had ACTUALLY seen the most beautiful ones.  My reply to them was, "I'll just know."  Well, today, July 16, 2011 I saw them and they were every bit as beautiful as I imagined them to be.


The saying, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder", pertains to most anything, sunrises and sunsets included.  You might look at my two photos and say, "Nah, those aren't the best.  The best ones can be seen at ________________________ (fill in the blank with your own special spot of the world).  But for Peggy Miller, these two will long be remembered by me as the most special ones I've ever seen.


Hey, here's where that "valuable lesson" part comes in.  I cannot remember one day in my 55 plus years of living that I have paid attention to and actually waited for the sun to come up and then set down again in the evening.  But today I did-and the time spent between 6:20 a.m. and 8:50 p.m. this day went by so quickly.  


I went to swimming lessons, complained about how hot it was, spent time with a special friend, continued to complain about how hot it was, did laundry and cleaned house, and made a trip to Haven.....and dozens of other little things.  And the world kept turning and life just went on.  I had to wonder as I was driving over to Haven tonight, did I spend this day doing what I should have been doing?  My answer came back "yes".  If the truth were known, I don't think that I could always say that.  


As I was leaving Haven, I didn't realize how fast the sun would sink in the west.  I had to hurry to get any kind of shot before it was too late.  And man, isn't that how life is?  That's why I am so frantically and diligently working on this whole list of things to do before I die.  I don't want to miss out on my chance.  And friends, I don't want you to miss out either.


So what was the lesson learned?  The answer is this-For the first time that I can remember, I didn't take everything for granted that came my way today.  I recognized it as the "gift" that it is. All of us are given just "so" many minutes between the sun's arrival and it's departure each day.  It's a reminder to me to live my life accordingly.  


With a very thankful heart, I say that today, July 16, 2011, was "a great day to be alive."  I hope you had such a day as I did.  Have a good night's sleep Facebook friends and family.  Be ready for the next great day....it's coming up before you even know it! 

on becoming a polliwog

Hey, this is me, after "learn to swim well enough to save my own life someday" lesson #3.  There's a reason I have a smile on my face.  Laurie, my swim teacher, told me that I'm doing well enough that by lesson #4, next Saturday, I might be able to get my "polliwog" certificate!  


I believe I had mistakenly referred to becoming a "tadpole" in a previous post.  That word "tadpole" is no longer used at the YMCA for its beginning swimmers.  We are the group "formerly known as tadpoles"....now to be called "the polliwogs". 


 So Dennis Ulrey, I am so sorry, but we're going to need to be working on rewriting that little poem that you came up with for me.  But as talented as you are with words and rhyme, that should be a piece of cake, or something like that.


Today's lesson was actually the first time that I felt comfortable in the water for 100 percent of the time.  I'm happy to say that I was able to do several things on my own today and feel confident that when I take the old "polliwog" exam, perhaps next Saturday morning, that my teacher will be able to put a lovely check mark beside each of those skills.  


I refuse to say that it was easy today, because it was far from that.  There was even a time when I almost had a "flashback" to 1965 and that sickening feeling I had of drowning in the water.  I was practicing face floating again and for some reason I lost my concentration and started to sink.  For one brief moment, arms and legs went thrashing and the burning feeling of chlorinated water went into my nose.  


All of a sudden, that 10-year old little girl came back and for a split second, thought about crying.  But luckily, Laurie was right there and I was just fine.  She saw how it had "gotten" me and said that I should just try again later.  I told her "no" that I wanted to try again right then.   And you know what, it worked! 


 I'm glad I didn't give into the fear and leave the pool.  If I wait another 45 years to get back in, I'll be, well, pretty old!  Not that a 100-year old person could not do that...I just don't know where I'd find a bathing suit then!  :)


One added bonus from this morning's lesson was to see another adult class going on at the same time in our smaller pool.  Two women, slightly younger than I, (ok a whole lot younger than me) were taking advanced lessons.  They had only learned to swim a year or so ago and they were back trying to become even better swimmers.  Laurie told me that they started out just like me and were able to become fairly decent swimmers in a short amount of time.  If those gals can do it, then why not me too?


I think back to that time so very long when I was that little kid who gave up on swimming lessons, just ONE day into them.  Now that I think about it, saying that I gave up after one day is really stretching it...I GAVE UP 5 MINUTES INTO THEM. 


 The beautiful girl in the photo below was my teacher, Jenny Fisher.  I am sure that she must have been pretty exasperated to have tried to teach me!  Now that I look back on it, I realize how brave she must have been.  Pretty sure that I nearly tried to drown her as well as myself that day when all I really needed to do was just STAND UP!  So I believe I will do my last lesson in honor of that very courageous swim teacher from the time of the "land of long ago and so very far away"......

                                                               Jenny Fisher of Haven, KS


To Jenny:  Wherever you are these days...this "little girl" never forgot you!  Thanks for putting up with my "water phobia" but I'm sure you will be happy to learn that I have since grown up and returned to the water!   On behalf of all the little kids you helped that summer, "our thanks!"

Bucket List #5-To see the most beautiful sunrise and sunset in the world....

I saw the most beautiful sunrise I have EVER seen this morning...Believe it or not, I am at a loss for words to describe how it made me feel.  Some things just don't even need a description.................

God's handiwork, at its finest of hours.  My life just continues to be blessed and may I always remember that.  Have a wonderful Saturday to all of you out there.  Take time to enjoy this day...mine started out so beautifully and I pray for yours to do the same.  :)

it's just a part of "the plan"

Five words that you don't really like to hear Morris Yoder say when starting the engine of his airplane-"Now that doesn't sound good."

Last night was to be my very first flight in a light sport airplane.   My good friend, Morris Yoder, had arranged for me to get to go up with him and travel to the Gypsum Hills area of southwestern Kansas.  It would have been a 90 minute flight in the Kansas skies and I was really looking forward to it.  

When I got there, I found Morris with a disgusted look on his face.  He said that as he was readying the plane he had found the battery to be dead and was in the process of recharging it.  We'd be a little later getting in the air, but all should be just fine.  So we waited.

Hey, I figure IF you are going to have problems with an airplane, the best place to have them is ON the ground, not off.  I have 100 percent trust in Morris and didn't worry a bit.  While we waited, Morris took my picture (below) so I could keep it in my "Bucket List" scrapbook.  

My first ever flight in a light sport aircraft-Skyview Power Parachuting  July 14, 2011

Shortly after the picture was taken, we climbed in the aircraft, buckled in, and kept our "fingers crossed" that the battery had taken the hour long charge.  And that's where Morris uttered those 5 dreaded words as he turned the switch on, "Now that doesn't sound good."  

The battery never turned over, and Morris being the very smart pilot that he is said that it looked liked we would have to do it another time.  Although it was disappointing to both of us, I figure it was for the best.  You know, you never really know why things happen as they do-it's just a part of "the plan."  

As I drove back into town and headed towards home, I came to the realization that something very good came out of this "non"-event.  For the first time in "forever", I wasn't afraid to climb into a plane.  What a relief to realize that!  I had allowed myself to be "tucked into" a very tiny, light sport airplane and I didn't even have to have a panic attack.  I believe there IS hope for me to sometime in the future get on an airplane again.  So nieces and nephews, be ready--for someday your Aunt Peggy will show up on your doorstep when you least expect me!  :)  OK, I'll probably call first.  

This "bucket list" idea has provided yet one more benefit.  I've learned that some of the weird fears that I have held onto for so many years really can be conquered after all.  Because I love life and have recently figured out that it's actually pretty nice after all,  I will always be careful.  That I can promise you.  

Keep life in perspective today on this Friday, July 15th friends.  

Love your friends and family-hang onto one another.  

Wishing for peace to be our journey today.

Remembering Ikarus

My life takes some of the goofiest dang twists and turns that I have ever seen!  Just when I think I can pretty much figure out which "end is up", something new is thrown into the mix.  People who know me know how frightened I am to fly in an airplane.    I've given up some chances to see my family members who live in New York and Florida, just because I don't want to step into a plane again.  It will be those people who won't believe what I tell them I am going to do tonight.


I just had a call from Morris Yoder, the gentleman who owns Skyview Power Parachutes.  Because of the terrible  heat, we've had to postpone the power-parachute idea for a while.  But Morris knew how much I was looking forward to going so he offered me an alternative to consider.  

Morris owns two ultra-light planes and he will be taking the one pictured above up this evening for a ride to the Gypsum Hills and back.  And, miraculous as it sounds, I'm going too.  That's right, I said I'm going too!  I have no earthly clue what it will be like but for some strange reason, I am not afraid anymore.


Hey, if it works and I survive, then I don't think I should be afraid to step onto a commercial airline and take off to points unknown.  So to Jessica in NYC, Sandi, Scotty, and Tony in Sarasota, and Mandy in Ft. Walton Beach....your Aunt Peggy MIGHT just become an air traveler yet!  


So my dear friends, please think of me tonight about 8 in the evening...boarding that ultra-light with "barf bag" at the ready!  (lol, don't worry!  :)  And while I'm up there, I'll be looking for the other half of the following Bucket List item...."To see the most beautiful sunrise and sunset on earth".


God has been so very good to me.....

On the gift of time

"Good Morning" friends-May I ask a question of you?
"How much do you value the gift of another's time?"  


My mom never had a "bucket list", well, at least what she would have called that.  But I'm pretty sure that she had her own "Lois Scott Wish List". My guess is that it didn't have much on it, at least what a person could buy at the store.  


I can remember asking her many times, "Mom, what do you want for ____________________?  (just fill in the blank with any special time that people feel this need to buy something for someone). 


Her answer would always be the same...."I just want you kids to be here." And I can remember rolling my eyes and drawing in a deep sigh and saying once again, "No, Mom, REALLY, what can I buy you for a present?  What do you need?"


I'm going to make a guess that many of you heard the SAME thing from your mom.  Isn't it strange that even after we give them a head full of gray hairs and every worried wrinkle on their brows, that they STILL love us and in lieu of any expensive gift, their desire  is to be close to us and spend time with us?  THEY WANT THE GIFT OF OUR TIME.  


I was reminded how special the "gift of time" was just last evening as I visited with a Facebook friend from the land of long ago and far away, my hometown of Haven, Kansas.  We sat and talked for over an hour.  For the price of a couple of "cokes", shared memories way more precious than any gift that can be purchased or charged to a Visa, were remembered.  It was the most wonderful hour of an evening that I have spent in quite some time.  


  Strangely enough, when I came home last night and looked in the mirror, I saw a different person once again.  And it was a "good" thing.  Amazing what a smile and laughter can do to your overall disposition with this thing we refer to as "LIFE".  The older I get, the more I realize, that one of the greatest gifts that a person can bestow upon another is the gift of their time.   Mom, you were right....once again!  :)


I continue to work on 3 items from the bucket list that I  hope to have accomplished by the end of the month.  The consistently hot temperatures here in our part of the world make going power-parachuting next to impossible.  My good friend, Morris Yoder, explained to me how the "thermals" in the air above us would provide one rocky ride for a power parachuter.  We've had to delay going until later on in the month.  I'm grateful for his advice and knowledge on this kind of thing.  Way too hot to "ride on the back of a motorcycle, very fast, and live to tell about it."  My good friends, the Brubakers, will help me with that one when the weather is more "hospitable."  


Good thing that swimming lesson #3 doesn't have to be postponed because of the heat.  Having said that statement, I do believe I may have "grown" a bit.  Just 3 weeks ago, I would have been looking for ANY excuse, weather related or not, to get out of going to lesson #1.  So come this Saturday morning, I'm going to head right back to the "Y", wade out to the 4.5 depth of water, and work hard at whatever my teacher asks me to do.  I have only 2 lessons remaining until I am done with the very beginning course they offer.  With luck, I will then be referred to as "Peggy, the tadpole."  Believe me, for those of us who weren't born "fish", YOU HAVE TO START SOMEWHERE!


Have a wonderful Thursday all you!  Stay cool, safe, and very well!  

the past is passed/that's why they call it that

This is definitely one post that I never planned to make.  In fact, it was a post that, just a few days ago, would have never entered my mind.  But things change and God continues to give Peggy Miller a "whack upside the head" from time to time.  And THAT leads me to yesterday.


When I look back on my life's journey from my childhood in Haven, Ks. to my years of being married and having children, to my time now in middle-age, a single, divorced person who is only in "charge" of herself, I remember a lot of "ups and downs".  The "ups" were great, fantastic! And the "downs" were, well, downs.  Depending on the circumstance, some of them were DEEP downs.  


Friends, it's those "deep down" times that seem to have a lasting impact upon us, at least in my case it has been.  Yesterday, I think I got the "message" that it was time to take care of one of those times in my life so long ago.  


If you don't mind, I'd rather not mention names or any particulars.  But I can tell you that it involved friends  now long gone from this earth as well as friends very much alive and well.  And it meant a trip to the cemetery, a simple bunch of flowers to decorate someone's grave on a very hot July day, and a common prayer, uttered with hopes of peace and reconciliation.  That was it-but in the end, for sure my life was made better for it.


For perhaps the very first time in my 55 years of existence, I believe I understood how it felt to really let go of something that I'd carried with me for a long, long time.  It was the strangest of feelings....my heart was lighter, my spirit lifted.  And when I came home from the cemetery and looked into the mirror I saw a "new person".  It was strange, I REALLY saw someone different.  And she looked a little less "stressed"out and a little happier.  And you know what?  I kind of liked seeing her that way!  :)


Having a "bucket list" continues to change my life each day for the positive.  And for the "life of me"  I cannot tell you how it happens for sure.  Maybe I'm just having an "awakening" or something.  Perhaps it was my time to start shifting gears a bit and preparing for something new that's waiting for me.  But whatever it is, my outlook on life has not been the same.  And that's a GOOD thing!  


Friends, have I known you long enough to ask?  ...."Are you carrying around some leftover baggage from life "long ago"?  If you are, then you know how heavy it is and what a burden it is to hold onto for so very long.  And it's always in the way, coming between you and life right now.  Just a thought, how about letting it go? And if you aren't ready to let all of it go, then how about starting with a little bit of it?  Baby steps, baby steps. It's easier than you think, PROMISE!

  I've always loved hearing this quote-sorry but I don't know who to attribute it to-


"Yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery.  Today is a gift...that's why they call it the "present".   My friends, may we always hold those words close to our hearts.

from the small town of Haven

Among the many gifts that my parents gave to me, perhaps one of the most beneficial was my upbringing in the small town of Haven, KS.  During my growing up years, from 1963-1976, that little community probably had no more than 1,100 inhabitants at any given time.  But that unique "band" of people stuck together throughout a lot of memorable and sometimes difficult times.


It was a town where you were "everybody's kid" in every sense of the word.  As my little sister Cindy and I walked to school each day, you could always count on some sweet little neighbor lady on the corner to greet you each morning with a friendly "Hello girls!" And that same sweet little old lady would be the first to tell you to get a "move on" or we'd be late getting to school. 


 Wisely, we both generally did just that because if we didn't, our parents would know about it before we even made it to school in the first place!  So, I'm only 40  years late in saying it but, "Thank you for loving us enough to watch out for us Mrs. ________. " (fill in the blank with the name of any sweet, little old lady who ever watched out for YOU as a kid!  


Sometimes I looked at that particular little old lady as a "prototype" for Samantha and Darin Steven's neighbor, Gladys Kravitz on the popular TV show of the day, "Bewitched".  Now as I've had a chance to reach a different level of maturity, I realize just how much she did care about us and watched out for our well-being.  


Haven was the kind of place where my mom found it quite challenging to get any exercise.   Mom never learned to drive so she got to wherever it was that she might need to go, by foot.  She loved walking and felt like it was the best form of physical activity that she could get.  Often she would make the journey from our restaurant at the edge of Haven to the downtown area, only a couple of blocks away. 


 One time I remember her coming back with a look of exasperation on her face.  I asked what happened and I will never forget her reply...  "People keep stopping me on the street and asking me if I want a ride somewhere.  I keep telling them that I like to walk but it didn't work!  Look who brought me back!"  As I peered out the door I saw dear Esther Bogner backing out of the driveway and heading back to work at Haven Electric.  Only in Haven could you have such a problem!  :) 


And I would be more than remiss if I didn't mention the outpouring of love and concern Haven people exhibited when my parents' home burned to the ground on Christmas Eve of 1976.  The people of that little town  came out in 'droves', just minutes after the fire completely gutted their home.  Postmaster Raleigh May was at the back door of the restaurant and handed my folks $100, just like that.  And he was ONLY the beginning. 


 For days and weeks after that, my family was the recipient of assistance from some of the dearest, most humble people that we had ever known.  If a fire can be a blessing, well, then I know we were most blessed to learn just how many people loved us there.  They were more than willing to give of themselves in order that our life could get  back to "normal" again.  The Scott family learned what "human kindness" was all about that Christmas.


I met a whole lot of people growing up there in Haven and went to school with many of the same kids from grade school on to high school.  It was a delight to get to catch up with one of them this morning.  39 years and the miles between Denver, Colorado and Hutchinson, Kansas could not separate my good friend, Annetta Grandon and I any longer.

Thank you Annetta for helping me work on #6 of the "Miller Bucket List".  I can't even imagine what some of the folks at IHOP must have been thinking when they heard us talking back and forth over breakfast.  What great conversation..... I think the mark of a very true friendship is being able to pick up right where we left off in 1972 without any problems!  And if not for Facebook, we might not have reconnected. 


The 2 young ladies shown below had no earthly clue what would be waiting for them in the years ahead.  But as we ate breakfast this morning together we had the chance to reminisce over that life so long ago.  Both of us agreed that we would like to return for a brief moment to those wonderful "days of yore".  


Haven, Kansas was the setting of our "simple lives" and both Annetta and I feel most blessed by the experience.  It was a wonderful place then.....it is a wonderful place, still today.

Peggy Scott, class of 1973

                                                 Annetta Grandon, class of 1972

with whatever time is left

I've just arrived back from Elliot Mortuary from paying my last respects to a wonderful woman who was a teaching colleague of mine from 2000-2003.  


  Cindy Beshore was a mentor to me when I taught foreign language at Hutchinson Middle School's  7th grade center.  I had spent the last 25 years teaching 6 and 7-year olds and the move to spending my days with kids from 12-14 years of age was QUITE the culture shock.  Cindy Beshore was a "calming" voice in what, some days, seemed like a "sea of middle-school chaos." 


 If I had a question about something or just simply needed someone to listen to me venting, it was Cindy that I always managed to seek out.  She never failed to  give me the advice I needed to make it through the day, the week or the 9-week's period.  Her passing leaves such a void in the lives of many people here, students and adults as well.  U.S.D. 308 students and staff were truly blessed by the gift of her presence.


When I read the story about her death in the paper this morning, it mentioned the fact that she developed her own "bucket list" upon learning that her death would be imminent.  Cindy set about in a feverish attempt to accomplish as much as she could with what time was left for her.  As I read about  the various things she wanted to do, including providing her parents with what they needed to be comfortable in their older years, it was a reminder of just how important the development of my bucket list is to me.


I have often wondered if my own list would look different if it was made with the knowledge that my life would soon be over--as is the case with so many who suffer from diseases like cancer.  What if I only had the time and strength for a list of 5 things instead of 10?  Would power parachuting one more time be nearly as important as seeing a lighthouse in Maine? How is the development of a bucket list different  when you are a reasonably healthy 55-year old like me instead of a 60-year old woman with terminal cancer, like Cindy was?  It forces me to stop and think........

This is my sister, Janice.  Here she is in her senior picture as a member of the class of 1959 at Burrton High School.  I was her  little 4 -year old sister when she was this age.  10 years later, she was dead...the victim of an auto accident.  She's been gone so many years now that, sadly I admit, I don't even remember much about her. Even though her stay was brief, Janice put a lot of life into those 27 short years here on earth.  


Now, in the summer of my 56th year, I've been afforded twice the amount of years that my sister was. I've learned, by paying the price of losing a sister at such a very young age, to appreciate each year that God gives us.  Every continuing birthday that I am blessed with by God is just one more year that she never received.


  So when I look in the mirror and see a wrinkle or remind my friend Kalisha to be on the lookout for gray hairs, I do so with the realization that they are the proof of the gift of advancing years.  I'm pretty sure the terminology of "bucket list" hadn't been thought of in those words in 1969.  Yet, if it had, I wonder what Janice's bucket list might have included?  Remembering the bits and  pieces that I do about her, I'm positive the #1 item would have been the following:


"To see my daughters grow into adulthood and to be a grandma."


Friends as you are most well aware of, each of us is "terminal".....we are born to die at some point in time in life.  We know not when.....  If you so desire to develop a "wish list" be sure to include those things that are most meaningful in your life.  What do you hold "near and dear" to you?  It need not be expensive--it need only be worth the time you invest in doing it.  And remember, time spent is never found again.


To my friend, Cindy....Thankful that you had time to take care of some of the "Beshore Bucket List".  Much obliged to you for taking me "under your wing" and "showing me the ropes" those many years ago at HMS 7. I'll see you again in Heaven, dear friend. 


A portion of a favorite poem of mine:


From "The Dash", a poem by Linda Ellis, 1996
(the first 4 verses)


I read of a man who stood to speak
at the funeral of a friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone
from the beginning to the end.


He noted that first came the date of her birth
and spoke of the following date with tears.
But he said what mattered most of all
was the dash between the years.


For that dash represents all that time
that she spent alive on earth 
and now only those who loved her
know what that little line is worth.


For it matters not how much we own
the cars....the house....the cash.
What matters is how we live and love
and how we spend the dash.