LESSONS IN VANITY

TO LOOK AT MY TOWEL CLOSET THIS MORNING, YOU'D NEVER KNOW IT WAS ONCE ORGANIZED.  USED TO BE, BACK IN THE " GOOD OLD DAYS"  OF TWO WEEKS AGO, EVERY TOWEL AND WASHCLOTH WAS MATCHED BY COLOR, WHETHER IT WAS SOLID OR STRIPE, AND FOLDED WITH CREASES THAT WOULD MAKE MY SAINTED GRANDMOTHER BROWN SMILE.  IT WAS THE KIND OF TOWEL CLOSET TO BE PROUD OF, ONE THAT YOU HOPED A GUEST WOULD ACCIDENTALLY  OPEN AND SAY, "OH MY WORD, WISH MY TOWEL CLOSET LOOKED LIKE THAT!"  NOT ANYMORE....

I HAVE LEARNED A THOUSAND LESSONS SINCE MY ACCIDENT AND PERHAPS AMONG THE MOST IMPORTANT WAS HOW MUCH TIME I MUST HAVE SPENT ON STUPID LITTLE TASKS JUST LIKE THE TOWEL CLOSET.  AND FOR WHAT?  TALK ABOUT TIME WASTED...

 AND THERE'S MORE...

I'VE LEARNED THAT  WHEN YOU LOSE THE USE OF ONE BODY PART, YOU CAN USE ANY BODY PART LEFT THAT IS WILLING AND ABLE TO STEP UP AND DO THE JOB.  YOU MIGHT BE SURPRISED AT HOW MANY DIFFERENT WAYS YOU CAN USE YOUR TEETH, MOUTH, ELBOWS, KNEES, AND FEET.

  UNLOCKING THE DOOR TO MY PICKUP YESTERDAY INVOLVED USING MOST OF THOSE BODY PARTS HERETOFORE MENTIONED.  FOR A SPLIT SECOND, I WONDERED HOW RIDICULOUS IT MIGHT LOOK TO  MY NEIGHBORS BUT THAT SOON PASSED AS I SUCCESSFULLY TURNED THE KEY.

 ANY OF US OUT THERE CAN DO ANYTHING THAT WE NEED TO, ANYTIME!  I NOW UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THE OLD-SAYING, "NECESSITY IS THE MOTHER OF INVENTION."

I'VE LEARNED TO DRESS MYSELF ONE-HANDED...NOT MUCH FUN, BUT DO-ABLE.  WITH A SHOWER CHAIR, I CAN SAFELY BATHE, WHICH BEATS SPONGE BATHS ANY DAY!  AND JUST BECAUSE I USE A SHOWER CHAIR, DOESN'T MEAN I AM READY FOR A RETIREMENT HOME--IT ONLY MEANS THAT FOR RIGHT NOW, I DON'T WANT ANY MORE BROKEN BONES.  BEFORE TWO WEEKS AGO, I ASSOCIATED SHOWER CHAIRS WITH HOVEROUNDS (THEY LOOK FUN) AND DENTURE CREAMS.  I WAS VAIN ABOUT STUFF LIKE THAT AND IT WAS STUPID ON MY PART.  THANKING GOD FOR THE "WAKE-UP" CALL.

SOMETIMES  I HAVE LOOKED AT HOW CROOKED THE FINGERS OF MY LEFT HAND ARE NOW, REMORSEFUL THAT THEY MIGHT NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN.  ONE MORE LESSON IN HOW VAIN I HAD BECOME--AT LEAST I STILL HAVE ALL 5 OF THEM ATTACHED TO A HAND.  ASK ANYONE WHO HAS LOST A HAND FOR ANY NUMBER OF REASONS AND I'M GUESSING THEY'D BE THINKING THAT CROOKED FINGERS WOULD BE JUST FINE FOR THEM.  I HAVE A LOT YET TO LEARN IN THIS LIFE,

I SURVIVED MY FIRST DAY BACK AT SCHOOL-EVERYONE WAS KIND AND HELPFUL TO ME.  I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.  WHEN THIS IS FINALLY OVER, I'LL BE HAPPILY PAYING FORWARD ON THE BEHALF OF A LOT OF GOOD FOLKS THAT I KNOW...AND EVEN SOME THAT I DON'T KNOW.

OH AND ONE  LAST THING, THAT WHOLE DEBATE ABOUT WHICH WAY THE TOILET PAPER SHOULD GO ON THE HOLDER?  THAT ARGUMENT IS TERRIBLY OVER-RATED!  HAVE A GREAT WEEK FRIENDS AND DO SOMETHING GOOD FOR YOURSELF-YOU DESERVE IT!

ME WITH "ELEANOR" ON THE FIRST DAY OF WORK-AUGUST 15, 2011