By the time you read this, I will be on my way to Colorado once again to spend the 3-day weekend in Montrose. According to the Weather Channel site, things are looking good for an uneventful trip out and back, at least "weather wise" and as Sammy Johns' so wonderfully put it in the "Chevy Van" song, "that's all right with me". Not anxious to find myself in a ditch this time with snow up to my car's door handles. It's always a lot more fun to go some place if you don't have to worry about the weather throwing the proverbial "monkey wrench" into your plans. I'm pretty grateful for that actually. The pass at Monarch will still be waiting for me to go up and over it and each trip that I make there, I actually feel much more at ease in doing so. Practice makes close to perfect, or something like that.
One of the things that I have tucked into the car with a whole lot of other stuff I'm taking out this time is something I bought once that I haven't even gotten to use yet (thankfully, I might add) but once I do need to use it, well it'll be forever. It was a real bargain, in comparison to what I would have had to pay for the "authentic" thing~$2.50 sounds a whole lot nicer to my "pocket book" than $250 + would have sounded. And thanks to a local thrift store run by the Mennonite Central Committee here in Hutch, I no longer have to look for an urn that my cremains will be buried in. Shown below, it's actually kind of pretty and I guess if things like urns and cremation are not something you would want to read about, I'll understand totally if you stop reading at this point. No offense taken at all~
Several years ago, I made the decision to be cremated when I died. My reasons were personal ones but I have to say that one of the driving factors of that decision was the extremely high cost of funeral home services these days. I visited one of the local crematoriums, viewed their facilities, asked a long list of questions about the process and then made the decision to have it done upon my death. I signed up for one of the pre-payment plans and although it took 3 years to pay it off, I finally did. I felt like it was the best thing I could do for my 3 children, giving them one less thing to deal with when I was gone. The only thing left for them to do was to dispose of my ashes in some manner.
The original plan, one that I held onto for the better part of two years, was for my ashes to be scattered around an old Kansas cottonwood tree sometime during the hot summer months. The only stipulation was that I wanted the wind to be blowing so that the cottonwood's leaves would be able to make their gentle "whoosh, whoosh" sound. Other than that, I had no other requests. Well the kids learned of my decision and one of their first questions to their mom was, "Well what do we do with you if you should die at any other time but summer?" I remember, with a grin on my face, telling them all~Ricky, Grahame and Ursela~ that one of them would have to "babysit" me until the right moment came. I'll never forget the look on their faces and the expression in their eyes as they shot one another panic-stricken looks. They didn't have to say a word because their faces said it all~"Hey, don't be looking at me. I'm not keeping Mom! You do it!"
Well, long story short, they ended up not having to worry about anything like that after all. Rather than having my cremains scattered about on the Kansas prairie, about a year ago, I opted for the traditional burial of them. When my time comes to leave the earth, I'll have my ashes placed in the wooden container shown above and laid to rest in an old Quaker cemetery near Halstead, Kansas, next my great-great grandmother. I listened to the advice of my very best friend who insisted that even though I was going to be cremated ( a process that he is personally NOT in favour of) that at LEAST I should have my ashes all in the same spot. We never did come to a consensus, he and I, about the merits/drawbacks to cremation and I guess it was one of those "agree to disagree" moments in time. My final place of rest has cottonwood trees all around it, so I guess in the end, I still will be where I wanted to be all along.
The subject of our eventual "demise" and departure from this earth is not one that people love to sit around the supper table and talk about. It really doesn't make for all that pleasant of a conversation in fact as a kid growing up, I never remember anyone talking about it. When my father died at age 59, now 31 years ago, none of his arrangements had been made ahead. I remember how hard it was for my mom and all of us kids to go into Bob Cantwell's funeral home in Haven and try to get things taken care of. Before Mom passed away, 25 years later, she had decided to get everything in order long before she even needed to worry about it. She was happy that she had a "say-so" in the matter of her death and was so relieved to know that we kids would have very little to do in preparation for her funeral. I remember thanking her for doing it and also telling her that she needn't worry about having to use it for a long, long time. When she did pass on at age 87, she did so knowing that things were ready. It was because of Mom's selfless act of preparation that I too, wanted to have things ready for "my time". Whether it be next week, next month or in the years ahead, I guess I am as ready as I could be for it. But in the mean time, I intend to live life to its fullest every single day that I get of it. My dearest of friends may you live your lives to the fullest as well. For whatever time remains for me, I am way more determined to enjoy it than I would ever be afraid to live it.
Have a good evening everyone~love you guys, all of you!
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