upon realizing the reason for life~

     From the "other side", a good Sunday morning to everyone out there.  The world outside is still dark and for good reason~the sanest of people are still asleep in their warm beds now and the ones that wake up at 4 a.m. are, well they're awake.  Mike is not one of those who prefer to arise before the appointed hour of 5:30 a.m. and after five months of our being married, has begun to accept the fact that I don't stay asleep for all that long.  I've always been this way and for whatever reason, I have had a difficult time in turning off that "internal" alarm clock of mine.  Shoot, who really needs sleep anyway?
     Yesterday was a great day for me and as I type these words with my now 58-year old fingers, I realize that for the first time since I've been here that I had a great day from start to finish.  This morning as I'm sitting here thinking about it all, I wonder what it was that made the day like that.  Was it because yesterday was my birthday?  Maybe, I guess.  Could it have been the well wishes of so many good folks?  Well, that surely contributed to it.  Or hey here's a possibility~could it have been because I finally allowed myself to embrace my life on the Western Slopes?  Who knows?  
     I was so afraid that I wouldn't make it through the day without being sad or missing Kansas and family/friends back home.  It was one of those "firsts" you know?  Yet when I woke up yesterday morning, it was with a sense of peace and tranquility.  Surely this was a gift as well for me and I know Who the giver was.  That sense of goodness and of things being "ok" for me lasted throughout the entire day.  How nice it was to not feel anxious or worried about the least of things.  I give thanks to God for that always.
     Even though I know how ridiculous it is to second-guess any reason for my life here now, I still wonder.  When I stand before my children in the fourth grade classroom at Olathe Elementary, I look out at their faces and give thanks to be their teacher.  They are a special group of kids and I believe they really need me.  Shoot, the fact of the matter is that I need them too!  It was so sweet during parent-teacher conferences this week to hear several of them tell the same story to their parents.  It was one I have told them many times already during the course of our first 9-weeks of school.  I told those 9 and 10-year olds of how I had searched all summer long with sadness and longing  for them but was afraid that I wouldn't find them.  When I nearly gave up, almost "threw in the towel" on ever teaching anyone again, there they were.  As their teacher I cherish them, protect them, keep my proverbial "thumb" on them, and try my best to guide them along the way this year.  Were they part of the reason I came here?  I believe they were.
     Have you ever stopped to wonder about why things happen in life as they do?  Ever given any consideration to why you are at a certain job, live in a particular spot of the world, have been given the blessings of this life or sadly, have had many "crosses" to bear?  Perhaps we all go through that from time to time and my best guesstimate is that many of us will wake up this morning and wonder.  I've done it all of my life and when I finally accepted the fact that my life was really a part of "the plan" set forth for me long before the date of October 26, 1955 ever showed on the calendar, it started to make the trials and tribulations of this life so much easier to bear.  My friends and family, dear ones to me all, I pray for you that this day ahead of us is full of peace for you.  In my heart, I carry each of you every day.  If you felt someone holding on to you and couldn't figure out who it was, well it was me.  
     I'm kind of laughing to myself right now.  In the course of the time that I've been typing this blog post, I have woken Mike up twice already.  In the quiet of the kitchen, the stillness of the early morning hours, I've kept hearing this rustling coming from the area of the mud porch.  At first he said it was probably a raccoon outside helping himself to the potatoes that were no longer any good.  Well now THAT was a comforting thought.  Still it kept coming and so he came out to check on things.  Didn't see anything but sounds like it might be time to set a "trap" for an unwanted guest.  Life here, never a dull moment.
     The sun will arise in an hour or so and now is a good time to get busy around here.  I'm getting some things packed up to send to my son Ricky and daughter-in-law Angie to tuck away for the March 1st birthday of their little baby.  I look forward in anticipation for the arrival of my first grandchild.  Although I won't be there to hold that little person when it is born, I'll be there sometime in the first weeks of his/her life.  I give thanks to God for that blessing.  Friends, yet one more thing before I go.  I have a good friend back in Kansas who has a granddaughter going through some pretty serious health issues right now.  She's heading back to the hospital today so that the doctors can determine the best way to treat the particular illness she has.  If you would be so kind, please say a prayer for her that God would direct the doctors as they give her care.  Her name is Grace.  Thank you friends.
     Wow, I just realized something.  I woke up this morning~I was meant to live past my 58th birthday so that must mean that God has something in mind yet for me to do.  With that in mind, I'm going to get dressed, put my shoes on and go out to find it.  If you are reading this, then you were meant to be here as well.  What are you waiting for?  Have a great day all.

Ok, and just for the record....I'd much rather look like this, than this.......

And if for some reason I don't make it home from school one day, well.....you get the picture :)