From time to time, I like to sit down and figure out just how old I am in days instead of years. Don't ask me why. Perhaps it is because I am easily amused at things just like that and for the record, I'm celebrating my 21,369th day of living right now. Lucky for me there is an online website that does all the calculating for me as I simply plug in my birthday of now over 58 years ago and "magic, magic" the number appears. And when I look at that number it does make a person pause to think just how many hours and days have gone by in a life that moves NOT at a snail's pace.
Mike and I have had many visits about what we will be doing this summer, the places we want to go and see and the projects that we want to do around the house here. Our list of "to do" things grows longer each day and if you could see the inside of our house, you'd find about a gazillion projects started and nary a one of them close to completion. Seems like more often than not we get ourselves into trouble when someone suggests buying a gallon of paint and a paintbrush and before you know it, a new project begins. Life is so short, and the days are precious and few, so it would seem good and right to live each day to its greatest potential.
More and more as the days go by, I find myself looking forward to the upcoming summer and the chance to do some of those things that we have talked about. Last summer was a "not so good" kind of moment for the both of us, with the first 6 weeks being the hardest of them all. I hung on through some of the worst bouts of homesickness I've felt in my whole life. Although I love Kansas and its people so very dearly (and always WILL for that matter), I cannot remember the last time I said to Mike, "I miss Kansas too much. I just want to go back home!" That, my friends, is a good sign.
Last night, I was looking at some of the blog posts I did last summer when I first arrived. I was looking for one of them, ANY of them, that showed a "hint of hope" that I was trying to overcome the initial shock of leaving home and make it here in this new life of mine. Hey, I'm not gonna lie to you, it took a little doings to find one. But I came across the one shown below, done about 3 weeks into being here and I have to admit, I smiled as I read it. It was my very first effort of sincerely trying to find my place here in south western Colorado. I didn't even tell Mike that I was doing the things I did that day and when he came home from work, I asked him to sit down at the kitchen table so that I could read it to him before I posted it online. We both laughed at a few of the parts and if I don't say so myself, I think I grew a couple of inches taller that day. Life here is a work in progress but I bet you can say the same thing for yourselves. Nothing goes as easily as we have planned it 100 percent of the time and shoot some days, I'm satisfied to find it going smoothly just on Monday :)
Time to ready myself for school now. Somewhere out there "the 18" are nestled safely into their beds, still fast asleep. Soon even their time will come to arise and prepare themselves for our day together. May your Monday be a very good one friends and from a place so very far away, someone is thinking of you and hoping you are "ok".
A BLOG POST FROM THE 13TH DAY OF JUNE, 2013
A DAY IN THE LIFE
Good evening everyone, friends and family~Greetings from south western Colorado where, so far so good, on any forest fires. We are thinking of all the folks on the eastern side, the Front Range, who are now enduring what may be a long-spell of fire danger. Praying for everyone to be safe and that no lives must be lost in this. It is my first experience with things of this nature and it is easy for me to see now, how one careless spark, one little flame can cause so much damage and wreak such a great amount of havoc.
This morning when I got up, I realized almost immediately that there were some things that I needed to do, some "fears" that I needed to face this day. I knew that if I could do so, that I'd probably stand a much better chance of being less homesick and also feeling like I would fit in here just a little bit easier in my new home of Montrose, Colorado. Now that the day has come and gone, I'm very glad that I did. I have a ways to go yet but hey, don't we all? I kinda/sorta conquered these 3 today and who knows? Maybe another day I shall conquer a few more :) They, like most fears that we all have, can "rob us" of much happiness. I got tired of allowing them to rob me of mine. I went "3 for 3" and in my books, that's a pretty good record. Here they are. Perhaps you shall see yourself in one of them. I'm not perfect and not sure that I ever will wish to be.
Unfounded Fear #1
This morning when I got up, I realized almost immediately that there were some things that I needed to do, some "fears" that I needed to face this day. I knew that if I could do so, that I'd probably stand a much better chance of being less homesick and also feeling like I would fit in here just a little bit easier in my new home of Montrose, Colorado. Now that the day has come and gone, I'm very glad that I did. I have a ways to go yet but hey, don't we all? I kinda/sorta conquered these 3 today and who knows? Maybe another day I shall conquer a few more :) They, like most fears that we all have, can "rob us" of much happiness. I got tired of allowing them to rob me of mine. I went "3 for 3" and in my books, that's a pretty good record. Here they are. Perhaps you shall see yourself in one of them. I'm not perfect and not sure that I ever will wish to be.
Unfounded Fear #1
"I cannot ride my bike here unless Mike is around just in case I have trouble."
7:48 a.m.~I saw my bike sitting in the mud room area of the house looking about as lonely and lost as I have been sometimes here. I thought to myself, "What's the use of having a good bike if you never get on it to ride?" I've only ridden it once since I've been here and that was one evening after Mike had gotten home from work in Grand Junction. The altitude took its toll on my lungs that evening as I struggled to even do 5 miles around the section where we live. An overwhelmingly steep hill just to the east of our house was a hard "cross to bear" as I finished up my ride. Huffing and puffing with lungs that felt as if they could explode any moment, I parked the bike on the porch and never got back on it again. That was a week and a half ago. Today I determined it to be a different story and with or without Mike here, I was going to get on that bike to try once again. If I had a flat tire, if I got altitude sickness, if I got lost...well I would just have to figure it out on my own. Guess what? None of that happened. I made the journey east to the stop sign, coasted downhill to Highway 50, turned west towards town and never pedalled once until I got to the stoplight on Hillcrest. Then the REAL ride began as I struggled uphill to the four-way stop to Locust Road and turned back east towards home. That same hill that nearly did me in not even two weeks back was there waiting for me. It hadn't gone anywhere and although I was determined that I would make it to the top of it without stopping, I unfortunately got off and walked it the last 15 yards. No sin in doing so I guess~seen a lot of cyclists around these parts doing the very same thing. Back home, alive and well. I am more determined to get back on that bike out here than I would ever be afraid of getting lost, having a flat tire, or even breaking an arm or two.
I actually got to conquer two fears at once here. When I went to set the automatic timer on the camera to go off, the dreaded message "Internal Memory Full" came up. Dang~that's what I'd been having trouble figuring out right before I left Kansas. I said to my kids that morning, "Hey, what does this mean? How do I get rid of it?" My daughter Ursela (who can do all of this kind of stuff in her sleep) said to me, "Mom, what do YOU think you should do?" Oh how I hate it when my kids talk to me like that. I know exactly what that means...it means that they believe I should try to figure it out on my own. Well, this morning I did and after pushing a zillion different buttons, sometimes with one eye open and the other one shut, I did figure it out. It was an accident, that's for sure, but I DID manage to take care of the problem.
Unfounded fear #2-
"The mountains that surround me have trapped me here~I wouldn't be able to get out if I want/need to."
10:38 a.m.~ok, ok...so I admit this one right up front. I'm a slight claustrophobic under normal circumstances. I'm an even greater one in the state of Colorado. At times in the last 3 weeks, I've kind of felt the presence of the mountains as a "trap" and that I couldn't get over them if I wanted to or needed to return to Kansas for anything. For "flatlanders" like me, the mountains might be beautiful the first time or two that you see them but after that, you're soon to be thinking that they would look a whole lot better if someone would just blast a hole through them so you can see what is on the other side (unfortunately, that's probably going to be a whole lot more mountains LOL).
When you stop to think about it, if anyone should have felt as if the mountains were impossible to traverse and that you wouldn't make it back over to the "other side" once again, it would have to have been the pioneers who settled this area in the late 1800's. For crying out loud, if THEY could do it without a GPS, AC in their automobiles (that they didn't have), or cell phones to stay in touch with one another, then surely I could do it if I had to. Having done it six times before now, some of those times in the dead of winter, then I know that I can as well.
I wanted to learn more about the area that I now live in and Mike suggested that I stop by the Bureau of Land Management Office located in the south part of Montrose. He told me about the maps and other resources available there that I could pick up in order to perhaps find some fun things to do. So today was the day and I'm really glad that I did. A wonderful woman name Helen greeted me at the door. She's a volunteer there and although I don't know this for a fact, she appeared to be in her late-80's and still one spry gal :) We spoke at length about the area and when she learned that I was from Kansas she proceeded to tell me that her grandparents were buried in the Butler County town of El Dorado, Kansas. Helen was a wonderful ambassador, a unique one-person "Welcome Wagon" for our city. She showed me a variety of brochures and maps, free for the taking, and encouraged me to get out and explore the immediate area. One brochure I picked up instantly gave me some ideas for my upcoming "Bucket List" here in Colorado. Another pamphlet told of the Dominguez-Escalante National Conservation Area, a place that Mike has said would be very fun and interesting to visit. Another one showed 10 interesting day hikes around the Montrose area. Perhaps those will be ones that we take some day in the future. As I get more familiar with my geographical surroundings, my hope is that the mountains will not be so foreboding to me. There are much worse mountain ranges to cross over than the ones we live by. For the least of these things, I give thanks.
A great facility in Montrose that provides a lot of educational information and material for residents and visitors alike.
Glad to have made the trip there this morning. Still am not completely over that feeling of being closed in but at least I understand a bit more of my surroundings. Understanding the terrain in this "neck of the woods" helps tremendously.
Unfounded fear #3-
I cannot go to the bowling alley on my own. It would be way too embarrassing to have no one to bowl with. Everyone would stare at me and say, "Wow, I wonder why that woman is bowling (so poorly I might add) all by herself?"
Straight up 1:00 p.m.~One of the things I first learned about Mike was that he not only enjoyed bowling on a league once a week, but also that he was a pretty dang good bowler. Since I've been here, now going on 3 weeks, we've gone down to the Rose Bowl together a couple of times and actually had some fun. I'm not such a good bowler, in fact over 35 years had passed since I last picked up a bowling ball. I am not the world's worst bowler but I did want to be able to bowl a little better than a 100 pin average. Mike has been so kind about it all, encouraging me to keep at it, congratulating me when I rolled the ball well and even gave me some pointers on how to pick up spares, even when the pins that remained were miles apart from each other. Yet, I STILL wanted to do better. I knew that I would need some practice and today seemed like the perfect day to just suck it up and walk into that bowling alley all alone and tell them I was there to rent a lane. And so I did.
Here's the crazy thing...there wasn't one person there who cared that I was going to be bowling alone. That didn't matter to them, not even in the least. I made some remark about wanting to get better at bowling and that I was there all by myself and what did I need to do? Shoot, they just asked me if I was old enough to qualify for free shoe rental as a "senior". With a shocked look on my face I asked them, "Well that depends. How old do you have to be here to be a senior?" When they said "50", I replied, "Heck ya, by 7 years already." And off I went. I ended up bowling 4 games, adding in that extra 4th one since I didn't have to pay for the shoe rental because my parents had chosen to have a baby in 1955. I can tell you this right now and would probably be able to say the same thing as I took my final breath in this life, "I will NEVER be good enough to join the Professional Bowler Association Circuit and never will I bowl a perfect game nor would I attempt to. Yet despite all of that being said, I still have found it to be a fun pastime, one that I can enjoy with Mike in the months and years to come. It just took a little bit of courage to walk into that bowling alley on my own this afternoon. My scores from my lowest of the four games and the highest of the four games are shown below. Please don't die laughing any of you, ok? For some of you, your "low" score is the same as my "high" score. My bowling prowess is still "in the works".
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Day's end is drawing nigh and soon the darkness will fall upon this side of the earth again. I've had a good day today because I made myself get out and do something different. When I begin working next week, I won't have the luxury of just dropping everything and doing things totally on the spur of the moment, on a whim. But today I did and friends I must tell you, I am so very glad.
Good night everyone and have a great evening wherever you are this day. Love you guys all!
Sometimes I need a "kick in the seat of the pants" to remind me just where I have come from and that I'm really a whole lot tougher than I admit to at times. I made it then, I will make it now.
Unfounded fear #2-
"The mountains that surround me have trapped me here~I wouldn't be able to get out if I want/need to."
10:38 a.m.~ok, ok...so I admit this one right up front. I'm a slight claustrophobic under normal circumstances. I'm an even greater one in the state of Colorado. At times in the last 3 weeks, I've kind of felt the presence of the mountains as a "trap" and that I couldn't get over them if I wanted to or needed to return to Kansas for anything. For "flatlanders" like me, the mountains might be beautiful the first time or two that you see them but after that, you're soon to be thinking that they would look a whole lot better if someone would just blast a hole through them so you can see what is on the other side (unfortunately, that's probably going to be a whole lot more mountains LOL).
When you stop to think about it, if anyone should have felt as if the mountains were impossible to traverse and that you wouldn't make it back over to the "other side" once again, it would have to have been the pioneers who settled this area in the late 1800's. For crying out loud, if THEY could do it without a GPS, AC in their automobiles (that they didn't have), or cell phones to stay in touch with one another, then surely I could do it if I had to. Having done it six times before now, some of those times in the dead of winter, then I know that I can as well.
I wanted to learn more about the area that I now live in and Mike suggested that I stop by the Bureau of Land Management Office located in the south part of Montrose. He told me about the maps and other resources available there that I could pick up in order to perhaps find some fun things to do. So today was the day and I'm really glad that I did. A wonderful woman name Helen greeted me at the door. She's a volunteer there and although I don't know this for a fact, she appeared to be in her late-80's and still one spry gal :) We spoke at length about the area and when she learned that I was from Kansas she proceeded to tell me that her grandparents were buried in the Butler County town of El Dorado, Kansas. Helen was a wonderful ambassador, a unique one-person "Welcome Wagon" for our city. She showed me a variety of brochures and maps, free for the taking, and encouraged me to get out and explore the immediate area. One brochure I picked up instantly gave me some ideas for my upcoming "Bucket List" here in Colorado. Another pamphlet told of the Dominguez-Escalante National Conservation Area, a place that Mike has said would be very fun and interesting to visit. Another one showed 10 interesting day hikes around the Montrose area. Perhaps those will be ones that we take some day in the future. As I get more familiar with my geographical surroundings, my hope is that the mountains will not be so foreboding to me. There are much worse mountain ranges to cross over than the ones we live by. For the least of these things, I give thanks.
My first time to see something like this. I know, I don't get out a lot.
Glad to have made the trip there this morning. Still am not completely over that feeling of being closed in but at least I understand a bit more of my surroundings. Understanding the terrain in this "neck of the woods" helps tremendously.
Unfounded fear #3-
I cannot go to the bowling alley on my own. It would be way too embarrassing to have no one to bowl with. Everyone would stare at me and say, "Wow, I wonder why that woman is bowling (so poorly I might add) all by herself?"
Straight up 1:00 p.m.~One of the things I first learned about Mike was that he not only enjoyed bowling on a league once a week, but also that he was a pretty dang good bowler. Since I've been here, now going on 3 weeks, we've gone down to the Rose Bowl together a couple of times and actually had some fun. I'm not such a good bowler, in fact over 35 years had passed since I last picked up a bowling ball. I am not the world's worst bowler but I did want to be able to bowl a little better than a 100 pin average. Mike has been so kind about it all, encouraging me to keep at it, congratulating me when I rolled the ball well and even gave me some pointers on how to pick up spares, even when the pins that remained were miles apart from each other. Yet, I STILL wanted to do better. I knew that I would need some practice and today seemed like the perfect day to just suck it up and walk into that bowling alley all alone and tell them I was there to rent a lane. And so I did.
Here's the crazy thing...there wasn't one person there who cared that I was going to be bowling alone. That didn't matter to them, not even in the least. I made some remark about wanting to get better at bowling and that I was there all by myself and what did I need to do? Shoot, they just asked me if I was old enough to qualify for free shoe rental as a "senior". With a shocked look on my face I asked them, "Well that depends. How old do you have to be here to be a senior?" When they said "50", I replied, "Heck ya, by 7 years already." And off I went. I ended up bowling 4 games, adding in that extra 4th one since I didn't have to pay for the shoe rental because my parents had chosen to have a baby in 1955. I can tell you this right now and would probably be able to say the same thing as I took my final breath in this life, "I will NEVER be good enough to join the Professional Bowler Association Circuit and never will I bowl a perfect game nor would I attempt to. Yet despite all of that being said, I still have found it to be a fun pastime, one that I can enjoy with Mike in the months and years to come. It just took a little bit of courage to walk into that bowling alley on my own this afternoon. My scores from my lowest of the four games and the highest of the four games are shown below. Please don't die laughing any of you, ok? For some of you, your "low" score is the same as my "high" score. My bowling prowess is still "in the works".
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Day's end is drawing nigh and soon the darkness will fall upon this side of the earth again. I've had a good day today because I made myself get out and do something different. When I begin working next week, I won't have the luxury of just dropping everything and doing things totally on the spur of the moment, on a whim. But today I did and friends I must tell you, I am so very glad.
Good night everyone and have a great evening wherever you are this day. Love you guys all!
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