My plan of attack was just to start sorting stuff into piles and in no time at all, I had managed to make one huge mess on the floor that ended up looking like a "Kansas tornado in the springtime" had come through. Friends, the real problem was that the "keeper" pile greatly outnumbered my "take it or leave it" pile. The sober realization of the fact that whatever I had "strung out" one-handed, would sooner or later have to be picked up again one-handed, began to soak in. What was I thinking?
Funny how the future disbursement of the material goods of one simple room in my house could be so confusing and challenging. After going back and forth for the better part of 15 minutes, I was about ready to give up the thought and start in a different room of the house. Right before I threw in the towel and moved on, I saw it. A piece of paper, folded crisply in half and wedged in between two photo albums.
I sat right down in the middle of the floor, amidst the stacks of "over my dead body will I give these up" and "why did I buy this for anyway?" and opened up the paper and read the words written inside. I know now what it means to say "my heart smiled" and if I share those words with you, perhaps yours will as well this day.
In addition to being an elementary school teacher, I also have worked since 2005 as a CNA in long-term care facilities here in Hutchinson. It's been an interesting life for me and this idea of working with people at both ends of the age spectrum, from the very young to the very old, has afforded me the opportunity to make many memories. I have a "teacher notebook" filled with the cute things that kids have told me over the years and as a CNA I kept a journal filled with the sage advice that my elders had given me as I took care of them. The page I found tucked between the photo albums was one that had accidentally fallen out of the journal but now that I think about it, I don't think it was an accident at all, but rather meant to be yesterday.
In one of my very first jobs as a CNA, back in 2006, I took care of the most remarkable 96-year old man named Lowell. We became friends right away and he always looked forward to the weekends that I would be there to take care of him. Lowell and I had a system that seemed to work out pretty good for us. I would never wake him up with cold hands and he would always smile and say "Florence? Florence Nightengale is that you?" When he needed to "head to the john" (that's how he phrased it) he'd always take his harmonica in there with him and play a tune. When I heard the music stop, I knew that he was either done or had fallen asleep and that it was time to check on him. And at night, when it was time to help him get ready for bed, he would always hang on to his hearing aids until I remembered to trade him the call light for them. Our routine worked pretty well....Lowell was happy and I was happy...a "win-win" situation if ever I did see one.
One of the first things you realize when you take care of the elderly is that getting too close to them is generally not the best plan but.....TOO LATE FOR LOWELL AND I because that had already happened. The year that I was able to be a part of his life was a joyous one for me. Looking back now, I wouldn't have changed a thing.
I was thinking of Lowell one Sunday evening that I was "off" and decided to pay him a visit. Stopping by Braum's first to pick up some strawberry ice cream for both of us to enjoy, I wheeled him down to the family room. For the next hour we sat there, just the 2 of us like a couple of little kids enjoying the great flavor of that dip of ice cream. We talked about everything EXCEPT living in a nursing home. In the course of our conversation, he said something so profound to me that the first thing I did when I got home was to write it down to later put into the journal. Those words were the ones I found on the sheet of paper yesterday...
I said that finding that paper yesterday was no accident and I believe that to be true. Here was a man who was travelling extremely light in his final years...happy with his harmonica, a radio to listen to all of the KU basketball games, and family and friends that loved him enough to be sure that he was well cared for. He no longer needed much in material goods and he knew it. His sights were set upon much greater things than that kind of stuff.
Pretty sure that Lowell would be "ok" with my giving myself a "do-over" as I go back to those stacks in the living room with a somewhat changed perspective. And by the way, to the 3 Facebook friends who emailed me their homework, "way to go" on some pretty ingenious ways to recycle some great things that they really never needed in the first place. Your great ideas have now inspired me!
And to dear Lowell~Peggy Miller's life was made so much richer by knowing you and those are the kinds of riches that no one can take away from me. See you in Heaven some day my friend and we'll say the state capitals together, once again~
No comments:
Post a Comment